NIghtowl
It's so quiet tonight. No traffic, no tv, no radio. Even the stray cats have burrowed down for the night.
I look out into the darkness, and contemplate the meaning of life. Why is it we only do that in the wee hours of the morning? Is it, perhaps, because we are creatures of the light, and in the darkness our souls soundlessly cry out? Or, perhaps the shadows in the world make us consider, in the quiet of the watch, the shadows in our own souls.
3 a.m. is a time for soul-searching, for speaking to your god or gods, for striving towards a moral balance that you, your soul, and your god, can live with. So here I sit, godless, contemplating the meanings of a spiritual realm I do not believe in.
I look up into the cloudless night, and feel the same awe that the very cavemen must have felt. The wonder, fear, and utter loneliness of the human race sobs quietly in the dark while I smoke a cigarette.
The moon is exceptionally bright tonight. I stand in awe of mankind-- for we dared the wrath of the gods. I imagine I can see the footprints of Neil Armstrong and the other men who dared trod upon that desolate wasteland. I wonder what they felt, in the deepest, darkest part of their souls, as they stood in a place Man was never meant to stand.
The neighbors across the alley have a light on. They keep it on all night, every night. A moth, I am drawn to the light, glancing at it every now and then, to be sure it hasn't burnt out. It sooths and comforts me. It stands as a beacon of humanity and of hope. Hope for what, I do not know. I simply stare at the light, knowing that all is well. I understand in a new way why man created gods-- to drive out the demons that play havoc with us in the watches of the night. I put out my cigarette, turn off the computer, and lie down, knowing that dawn is coming soon. With the dawn comes the renewed promise. I fall asleep, dreaming of Noah, and of rainbows.
posted by Hannah at 1:58 AM
11 Comments:
Is it just me, or does this ad say it all?
Yes, 3am, the hour of supreme stillness and solitude. I too, have felt it. You capture the essence of that time of reflection and search for meaning, a universal human experience. As we see it through your eyes, we experience your 3am and we nod inwardly, acknowledging our personal 3am's and know in some way, even in this time when we are most alone, we are somehow connected.
Hannah, don't you EVER come to me and say you cannot write. This piece is staggering in its magnificence. The imagery is so right, it transports us there with you - anyone who has been awake at 3:00am, anyway. You nailed it, Hannah; great work.
As for the ad, it performs a service. It tells us where NOT to go... ;)
Actually, that was unfair - about BlogLadder, I mean. Lesson for self: Don't knock it till you've tried it (I should know this as a smoker).
I went and had a look and it is a bold enough attempt to bring order to the chaos that is the blogosphere. The few blogs that I looked at where earnest and inoffensive, which is good for the state of the disunion. Sites like these point out the major problem of blogdom; that there are too many voices shouting to be heard. How to find the voice that does not grate on your ear, that does not insult your intelligence or merely mouth platitudes or nonsense? The blog directories are an attempt to make things easier - good luck to them, their task is nigh impossible. They need members to be worthwhile yet the more they collect (BlogLadder's advert is an attempt at this), the more unsearchable the thing becomes. They institute search systems, hoping to provide an answer, but are defeated by the meaninglessness of blog titles. They group in categories and soon each category is so full as to require search and selection again.
Bloggers group together in the hope of becoming big enough to be noticed. In this cacophany of white sound, who can blame them? But the thing is altogether too big; its very size defeats it. The only hope is that somewhere, somehow, two nerds with nothing but enthusiasm to guide them work presently on a new idea, a "Google" of blogdom, to rescue us all.
Phonebook anyone?
You guys DO realize, do you not, that had it been any other time of the day, this nonsense would have been immediately deleted? :P
See how we are all so similar, and yet different. Hannah likes the bulb across the way; I want to take a stick to it. Darn neighbor and their all-night light. But she does go and deliciously disproves that quip about nothing meaningful ever being said after midnight, and captures a mood without ruffling nary a feather.
Had it been any other time of day, this nonsense would not have occurred to me. :D
However.
The piece is beautifully written. Do not blame us for pointing this out.
Purely incidentally, the answer to life, the universe and everything is 42.
And the reason man made the gods you speak of is just as you say: to reduce great things to a size in which they can be handled.
Arthur, not being a creature of the original earth, has the incorrect imprint. The answer is fourty-two, but the question-- ahhhhh, there's the rub.
Incidentally, 3 a.m. is the opposite of 3 p.m., when Jesus is said to have died. 3 a.m., therefore, is supposedly when they are at their strongest and most active.
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